| Maan | 19 | Laguna |
| Dancer | Dreamer |
What's in my blog are all about my feelings, thoughts and experiences. These are the real stories behind my tears and smiles. ❤
Former maghihintaylangako/naghihintaysimaan
Blogging since October 2010

August 22, 2014 :”>

Thursday, June 5, 2014
Hi maan :) I was checking blogs until I saw yours. Isa ka sa mga fave blogs ko ever since nag tumblr ako. Wala lang nakakamiss mag TA sayo at maging updated sa life mo :)

Woooow. Ka-flattered po. :”> Di na ako active dahil busy na pagtatrabaho. Pero thank you, thank you. Ang sarap naman mabasa nito, ganitong pagod at mabigat ang loob ko today. Parang gusto ko na ulit maging active. Thank you solid. :”“”>

Sunday, May 18, 2014
Love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections.

Love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections.

Monday, May 12, 2014

Scared. Pressured.

Ito yun kinakatakutan ko pagkatapos mag-aral e, kung san na ako pupulutin! Haha. Isang buwan na din akong bakasyon mula nun graduation. Wala pa din akong trabaho. May mga inapplyan naman ako through email, sa Manila. Pero ayaw nila Mama at Papa. Nag-apply din ako sa Convergys. Yun talaga yun sayang e. ALMOST. Napuri na ako ng nag-interview sakin don kaso kinulang talaga ko ng 5% dun sa isang call test. Pota sayang. Kung di lang ako kinulang ng lintek na 5% na un, for requirements na ako! At dun pa sana sa gustong-gusto kong maging lugar at trabaho. Dun ko kasi nakikita talaga yun sarili ko, sa isang call center. Pero baka hindi pa para sakin yun chance sa Convergys. Pinababalik ako don, pero hindi pa din ako nabalik. Ewan ko ba. Parang mas gusto ko pang magsimula sa mababa muna. Aminado kasi akong hindi ako nag-aral mabuti. Nakakapagsisi. Ang daming nagsasabi sakin na magaling at matalino ako kaya dapat sakin e yun magandang trabaho. Pero minsan nawawala na ko e. Yung tipong biglang magbabago yun plano ko dahil sa mga nangyayari. Big factor ang magulang ko e. Kahit gusto kong lumayo, hindi talaga pwede dahil hindi ko sila pwede maiwanan. Kailangan uwian. Pero kahit ganito yun nangyayari sakin ngayon, hindi ko pa man maabot yun gusto ko, alam ko sa sarili ko yung gusto kong mapag-ipunan, makuha at marating. Tiis lang Maan. 

Thursday, April 17, 2014
"If a girl understands your bullshit, sticks through your mistakes, and smiles even when you’ve done nothing for her — it’s obvious she’s a keeper. But it’s also obvious you don’t deserve her."
(via ohlovequotes)
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Monday, April 14, 2014
Let the pain remind you that hearts can heal. 

Let the pain remind you that hearts can heal. 

Sunday, April 13, 2014

elghort:

“It’s a metaphor,” I said, dubious. Mom was just idling.

“It’s a metaphor,” he said.

“You choose your behaviors based on their metaphorical resonances…” I said.

“Oh, yes.” He smiled. The big, goofy, real smile. “I’m a big believer in metaphor, Hazel Grace.”

Wednesday, April 9, 2014
I can’t believe na aalis na talaga ko sa aking alma matter. 8 straight years oh. Goodbye LSPU na talaga! Yan talaga yun place kung san ako nag-grow not only as a student,but as an individual too. A place where my personalty built over the past years of my life. Lalo na daw yun akin communication skills. HAHA. Mula sa neneng-nene days, sa pasaway days, sa nagpakatino na days, at sa naging petix student days! Yan din ang nakasaksi ng iba’t ibang hair styles ko no. HAHA! Lahat na ata! Haaay. Thank you sa lahat ng naging profs ko mula nung high school, hangang ngayon college. Sa mga naging kaklase ko. Lalong Lalo na sa aking loving and most maingay friends. HAHA! Sa mga naging ka-close ko sa ibang sections/departments, basta sa lahat ng nakilala ko jan sa LSPU at maiiwan pa jan. Saka pala dun sa mga taong nag-iwan talaga ng bakas sa college life ko. Nako alam nyo na kung sino kayo.  HAHA. Mamimiss ko kayo lahat. Kulang ang long post na to para ienumerate ko isa-isa ang lahat ng mamimiss ko jan. Memories.  Sinong mag-aakala na yun taong ayaw pumasok jan ng high school e jan pala makakatapagtapos. HAHA.  Mama and Papa, ito na po yun pagbubunga ng sacrifices at paghihigpit nyo sakin ng medyo oh. Huhu. Para sa inyo to. At kay Lord, sobrang lahat ng nangyari sakin e considered as blessings. Kahit yung iba, blessing in disguise. Everything happens for a reason talaga no. Huhu. The best ka! :’) Bow!! 

I can’t believe na aalis na talaga ko sa aking alma matter. 8 straight years oh. Goodbye LSPU na talaga! Yan talaga yun place kung san ako nag-grow not only as a student,but as an individual too. A place where my personalty built over the past years of my life. Lalo na daw yun akin communication skills. HAHA. Mula sa neneng-nene days, sa pasaway days, sa nagpakatino na days, at sa naging petix student days! Yan din ang nakasaksi ng iba’t ibang hair styles ko no. HAHA! Lahat na ata! Haaay. Thank you sa lahat ng naging profs ko mula nung high school, hangang ngayon college. Sa mga naging kaklase ko. Lalong Lalo na sa aking loving and most maingay friends. HAHA! Sa mga naging ka-close ko sa ibang sections/departments, basta sa lahat ng nakilala ko jan sa LSPU at maiiwan pa jan. Saka pala dun sa mga taong nag-iwan talaga ng bakas sa college life ko. Nako alam nyo na kung sino kayo.  HAHA. Mamimiss ko kayo lahat. Kulang ang long post na to para ienumerate ko isa-isa ang lahat ng mamimiss ko jan. Memories.  Sinong mag-aakala na yun taong ayaw pumasok jan ng high school e jan pala makakatapagtapos. HAHA.  Mama and Papa, ito na po yun pagbubunga ng sacrifices at paghihigpit nyo sakin ng medyo oh. Huhu. Para sa inyo to. At kay Lord, sobrang lahat ng nangyari sakin e considered as blessings. Kahit yung iba, blessing in disguise. Everything happens for a reason talaga no. Huhu. The best ka! :’) Bow!! 

Sunday, April 6, 2014

General Practice for Graduation.

Ito na yung huling araw na college student pa kung ituring ako. Fiesta samin, nagpunta barkada ko at nagkainan. Gulat si Mama kasi mga babae lahat kasama ko, pero ang titindi nilang kumain. Tuwang tuwa sya! Sabay na din kasi yun pakain na yun sa parang blow out ko na din dahil graduating na. Waaaaa! Natural naman sa barkadahan namin yun lintek magtawanan pag magkakasama, pero ramdam kong iba talaga yun araw na yon! Kasi nga last day na! Yung tawa at ingay namin na kahit sino hindi makapigil. Hahaha. Nun kinakanta na yun graduation song na “Time of my life” by David Cook, sa kalagitnaan nun kanta, nag-uumiyak ako! Hindi ko din inakala. Nun simula nun kanta, nalulungkot na ko kasi nga 8yrs ako don sa school na yun tas ito na talaga yun time na aalis na ko dun! Sabog iyak ko! Tawa ng tawa barkada ko! Pati yun ibang girls from other sections, napapangiti dahil nag-uumiyak ako. Hahahahaha. Hindi nakakalungkot kasi talaga. Sobra! Pag nga maalala ko, nakakaiyak pa din! HAHAHA.

Friday, April 4, 2014
"

Forgive me for not doing the things I have said to you. Forgive me for being not true in my words. Forgive me because I am still reading and re-reading our late night conversations not even demurring that I have memorized them all; every letters, every periods you have used, every commas and every punctuation marks, even in every pauses you made just because I made you speechless. I should have done what I have said to you out of anger, that I will delete all the files you have tattooed in me but I can’t stand the pain of erasing them, they were already on my skin, I am wearing them. If only they were written on papers then I’ll just burn them all but no, they were scribbled in my heart.

Forgive me for playing repeatedly all the songs we have sung together during late afternoons or even when I get you to sleep. Forgive me for putting them all on my playlist and be loner and sometimes crying and locking herself in her bedroom, keeping herself away from world’s company and affection. Forgive me for listening unto them as I go to sleep or as I watch stars thinking you are doing the same thing. Forgive me for singing those songs and be reminded of you. They say you can select memories to be remembered but I am incapable. I really am sorry for not helping myself out to learn how to select memories who doesn’t involve you. I always loved remembering you.

Forgive me because I choose to memorize you even in the middle of playing in front of them as if I have an amnesia and telling my friends I already have forgotten you. Forgive me for being in love with the scars you have caused. Forgive me for not wanting to heal them. It is always been my pleasure of being hurt because of you. Forgive me for being like this. Forgive me for continuing to love you even if you had already stopped loving me a long time ago. Forgive me. It is all that I am asking from you, your forgiveness. Maybe one day I’m going to meet someone who would make me listen to those songs without being reminded of you or make me hear of the same lines you have told me without me getting hurt. Someday, maybe, I will.

"
forgive me for not getting over you, msshearty (via escafeism)
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Let the pain linger for a while. Kung naiiyak ka, iiyak mo lang. You'll be okay soon. Time heals everything. We're still young, ang ganda mo pa oh. Smile even if it hurts. Kasi soon ngingiti ka rin na wala na ung pain. Look, happy na ako kahit 2 months palang na single ako from my failed more than 3 years na relationship. Surround yourself with friends and sympre family mo. I feel complete na even without my former bf.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. :’) Sana isang araw, makalimot na ko. Yun totally na wala na lahat ng sakit. Ang hirap e. Hindi naman naging kami pero sobra kong nafall. :( Salamat ha. Saludo ako sayo. :)))

"Ang hirap nung ginagawa mo lahat para makausap siya. Tapos siya parang wala lang sa kanya."
(via matabangutak)

Tulungan nyo ko mag-move on.

Tatlong buwan na yun nakakalipas. Akala ko okay na ko sa lahat ng nangyari e. Tanggap ko, oo. Sa tuwing magkakasalubong o magkikita kami sa school, wala lang naman e. Pero hindi ko mapgilan yun sarili kong hindi sya tignan kahit nasa malayo sya. At sa totoo lang, tatlong buwan na mula nun nagpasya syang tumigil na, pero sa araw-araw. hindi pwedeng di ko iviviewn profile. Umaasa pa din ako. Naghihintay pa din ako na baka sakaling maging okay pa e. Hindi pa din pala kampante yun loob hangang wala kaming closure. Naiinis na ko sa sarili ko e!! Sobra. Inaantay ko na lang yun graduaton namin e. Yun hindi ko na sya makikita, wala na kong maririnig na kahit anong balita sa kanya. na pota, sana makalimot na ko.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014
 
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